''Mr. Slash'' Mug

Name: Mr. Slash (a.k.a. “The Masked Professional”)
Position: Campground Horror Specialist
Objective:
To deliver high-quality scares with efficiency, consistency, and just the right amount of trauma for returning customers.
Skills:
Advanced stalking and dramatic entrances
Clipboard management & punctuality
Grading screams (A+ for shrieks, D- for nervous giggles)
Multitasking: scaring campers and finishing coffee before it gets cold
Experience:
10+ years haunting lakesides, forests, and abandoned cabins
Successfully reduced “unscreamed” campers by 40% through better scheduling
Awarded “Employee of the Fright” three years running
Education:
Certified in “Jump Scares & Chainsaws”
Weekend workshop in “Team-Building for Villains”
References:
Campers (too traumatized to answer the phone)